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Not a good week for Ben to be bitten by a pig (swine flu being so big in the news and all). Have not told anyone in case we were then surrounded by SWAT teams, the Daily Mail and Max Clifford.

Am spending the afternoon ‘bagging up’ jam jars full of baby stick-insects, as will be hosting the most bizarre playground sale at school on Tuesday. Planning on loading up small boys who will then look soulfully at their mothers in order to keep the precious cargo. I think I might become temporarily rather unpopular at the school gates, but have become desperate owing to huge success of accidental breeding programme. Spend every morning catching, now teenage, ‘nymphs’ who are sensibly trying to leave home, and shoving them back in with their reluctant and overcrowded parents.

Managed to survive the Easter Hols with reasonable serenity – although not much sign of oppressed husband (due to the finding of body parts at regular intervals in addition to the usual episodes of homicide).

We have started the new term with enthusiasm. Eagerness to start back was universal. Imogen as she has landed the lead role in the Musical and was word-perfect before the 1st rehearsal having devoted every waking hour to this over the last month – it takes a damn sight more than ‘a spoon full of sugar’ to make that ‘medicine go down’ I say (more like a pint of gin). Sam is ‘doing’ dinosaurs this term – god knows what more he needs to taught on that subject. Ben just keen to get back to his harem.

Harriet has developed a button-pushing fetish which as led her to reprogram bits of the pc. and break the DVD player in her determination to do the ‘upsy daisy dance’ AGAIN.

News here is that we should be on the move again. Tenancy up in a couple of months and nowhere else to rent near the school means that we have taken the plunge and are trying again on the house buying front. Same property as before, but this time they have accepted our offer. Hurrah! So off we go again.